Gaz Cooks Crap

So before we start down this slippery slope to culinary purgatory, just to be clear I will be eating everything I make (well, trying at least - I may not be able to force it all down), and trying to make stuff as cheaply as possible with as little waste. Failing being able to stomach it myself, I have 2 cats and one will happily eat tissues and/or the sick of the other one, so fingers crossed there won't be much going in the bin. Except possibly the cat if something turns out particularly badly. Anyway, as crack addicts almost certainly say before taking a hit, let's get cracking. I've kept it simple by doctoring a regular sponge recipe by national treasure (in that she's as old as many geological gemstone finds), Mary Berry. If for some inexplicable reason you fancy cooking along in the comfort of your own home (and in safe proximity to your own lavatory), you will need: For the cake: 113 g (4 oz) self-raising flour 113 g (4 oz) butter 113 g (4 oz) of 'speci...

Years ago, I had a simple dream. To open a deliberately terrible restaurant that sold absurd food to morons at exorbitant prices, which they would pay to prove how stupidly rich they were. That dream is yet to come true, but given the entire world seems to have gone batshit crazy of late, I feel my time is coming. So with only a modicum of further ado, because I'm not posting my first recipe until tomorrow, I thought it was high time I started putting together my menu. I present to you (or at least I will in about 20 hours)... Gaz Cooks Crap. Tomorrows recipe will be: BEEF SPONGE